I pray that my computer will continue to work first of all! Secondly, I pray that I will be able to manage to scrape together the money to upgrade my computer! I apparently need to upgrade my memory! I think I have that personal problem as well!!
Its not as easy as dumping out old unneeded files from your hard drive and they are gone for ever! Some how, some way something happens to remind us that they ocurred and it really messes up our mind! Come to think about it I guess it is like a computer hard drive, for if you don't know how to really permanently delete a file, chances are there is a copy somewhere on that hard drive!
Today and the past few days I have been thinking about making amends with someone for something they have no clue what they did. Something very simple caused me a set back and its all because of what that one situation brought about from my memories. Ones that I thought I had dealt with and closed the book on. I want to appologize to this person and explain some things to them but they make it very difficult. Actually, I'm the one who has probably made it difficult, because of course I have to do it in my way! But there are reasons for that as well.
I have been stepping out of my comfort zone a lot lately and I owe that to God's Grace!
Sometimes though I don't know exactly what God is trying to tell me! A situation could go either way. It gets very confusing! I usually tend to let something go and I wonder what if? Then if I deal with something and it turns out one way, I wonder What if the other? Confused? Well, I guess you understand me!
I often wonder IF things in the past had only been different I wouldn't have all these problems today! But I know that God meant for me to use these things for the good of all in some way! I am just trying to find that way! I just wish it wasn't so confusing or so difficult trying to find it or knowing if its in front of me or not!
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