Mar 6, 2008 | 7:40 PM
Category: Faith
I catch myself gazing out my window in front of my desk. Its early morning and I should be getting into my work, but I can't concentrate. Instead, I open a can of "Monster" low carb energy drink because the first cup of coffee did absolutely nothing for me.
I want to close my eyes and Just SLEEP!!!!!!! I think I could fall into a deep coma right now if given the opportunity. My eyes are so heavy.
My gaze captures a bird sitting on the top of a weather vane perched high above the bank across the street. I am on the 8th floor and he is just above me. Its rather windy out already and there is a storm front starting to move through. But that bird is doing his best to keep his grip on that metal bar wobbling back and forth, daring not to let go.
I find it quite synonymous with the monotony I currently find myself in, which lately seems to be the story of my life. Trying to do all that I can to hang on and not give in, and to just not let go.
I find it quite ironic as well, that this weather vane has its' North, South, East and West all spinning in the wrong direction as if not knowing where to go. This too resembles the fact that my life seems to be spinning out of control and I have no SURE direction to turn. Any step that I take would simply be a guess. And I am so terribly horrified at making the wrong step in the wrong direction.
I worry about what others will think and don't really concern myself how it will affect me. When the only answer I really need to think about is that "GOD" is the only direction that I should be turning. But even now, for some reason, that has become a little confussing for me at times and I feel such a turmoil over it inside. I just want it all to STOP!!
Saturday, March 08, 2008
God Heals
Mar 8, 2008 | 7:56 AM
Category: Faith
"Time has a way of healing all wounds" or so the expression goes. I find that to not be true. "GOD HEALS" ALL WOUNDS, but the timing is all HIS!!
Mostly I think GOD is waiting for us to learn something from each experiance we go through. Sometimes, it takes longer than others.
For me, this time, its been to sit and listen to GOD in whatever I'm doing. Some how, I managed to forget to JUST LISTEN!!! I also forgot to just sit back and Forget about "What Needs to be done", and listen to what my "Heart" and my "Body" is telling me. My mind was so scrambled I didn't know which way was up.
Thursday, I was very fortunate to have a loving brother (one of five) who took the time from his busy schedule to fix my car. Its what he does for a living (replaces windows, windshields, etc). Actually he retired, but is busier now than before. Blessed by God to have the work.
Anyway, while he was fixing my rear window and door lock, I took the time to be one with God. Got my fishing pole and tackle box out of my trunk and walked over to his pond. I did a lot of thinking, listening and felt cleansed. By GOD and his beautiful creation. I caught 3 brim, and 6 catfish and threw them back. (Fishing - sounds like another in depth topic for another day).
Later in the day I was watching a Movie about a woman with cancer she was very independant (like me) but wanting to share her life with someone (like me) and this male friend of hers, "GUY" , said something about her having to be "In control". Wow, what a thought (just like me). And then he asked her "How's that working for you?" ("DING").
Its not like I havn't heard that before. But I think that is what really made it stand out this time. I knew GOD was reaching out to me in this Movie. Everything I seemed to turn on the TV had the same effect. I eventually got off my duff and went into my junk room and started the Impossible task of sorting through things. I got quite a bit done! Have a stack of stuff for a Garage Sale. But still have a long way to go.
I managed to venture out to a doctors appointment, then to the store and bought a couple of organizers to work on the mounds of receipts and papers from the past year so that I can do my tax return.
The Main thing is.... I took the right step! I turned to GOD and listened to HIM and I am feeling a lot better for it. No, It doesn't make all my problems go away! But I have three people in one on my side, My Father God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit! Something else "new" that I have learned about. Will share in the future.
I hope you'll join me on my exploration for the TRUTH in my life! We all have that same access. I invite FRIENDLY ECOURAGEMENT AND DISCUSSION ONLY!
I have had enough Rejection, abandonment and plain Ugliness in my life! Its not welcome here! I appreciate your Respect!
Category: Faith
"Time has a way of healing all wounds" or so the expression goes. I find that to not be true. "GOD HEALS" ALL WOUNDS, but the timing is all HIS!!
Mostly I think GOD is waiting for us to learn something from each experiance we go through. Sometimes, it takes longer than others.
For me, this time, its been to sit and listen to GOD in whatever I'm doing. Some how, I managed to forget to JUST LISTEN!!! I also forgot to just sit back and Forget about "What Needs to be done", and listen to what my "Heart" and my "Body" is telling me. My mind was so scrambled I didn't know which way was up.
Thursday, I was very fortunate to have a loving brother (one of five) who took the time from his busy schedule to fix my car. Its what he does for a living (replaces windows, windshields, etc). Actually he retired, but is busier now than before. Blessed by God to have the work.
Anyway, while he was fixing my rear window and door lock, I took the time to be one with God. Got my fishing pole and tackle box out of my trunk and walked over to his pond. I did a lot of thinking, listening and felt cleansed. By GOD and his beautiful creation. I caught 3 brim, and 6 catfish and threw them back. (Fishing - sounds like another in depth topic for another day).
Later in the day I was watching a Movie about a woman with cancer she was very independant (like me) but wanting to share her life with someone (like me) and this male friend of hers, "GUY" , said something about her having to be "In control". Wow, what a thought (just like me). And then he asked her "How's that working for you?" ("DING").
Its not like I havn't heard that before. But I think that is what really made it stand out this time. I knew GOD was reaching out to me in this Movie. Everything I seemed to turn on the TV had the same effect. I eventually got off my duff and went into my junk room and started the Impossible task of sorting through things. I got quite a bit done! Have a stack of stuff for a Garage Sale. But still have a long way to go.
I managed to venture out to a doctors appointment, then to the store and bought a couple of organizers to work on the mounds of receipts and papers from the past year so that I can do my tax return.
The Main thing is.... I took the right step! I turned to GOD and listened to HIM and I am feeling a lot better for it. No, It doesn't make all my problems go away! But I have three people in one on my side, My Father God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit! Something else "new" that I have learned about. Will share in the future.
I hope you'll join me on my exploration for the TRUTH in my life! We all have that same access. I invite FRIENDLY ECOURAGEMENT AND DISCUSSION ONLY!
I have had enough Rejection, abandonment and plain Ugliness in my life! Its not welcome here! I appreciate your Respect!
Breezy Days
So, I'm sitting in my living room trying to work on my blog. Its breezy out! No its down right WINDY out there! But I don't mind the wind, especially when I am inside! Or... Sitting on a hot sandy beach soaking up the sun! But that can be dangerous for the likes of a redhead like me! Though its not stopped me before!
Speaking of Beaches.... Thats one of my favorite places to fish! As long as I can keep the images of "JAWS" out of my mind!!
So, its like today, have to focus on the positive!! Pray that GOD will take care of the Negative and that HE will make all things work out for the better!!!
Speaking of Beaches.... Thats one of my favorite places to fish! As long as I can keep the images of "JAWS" out of my mind!!
So, its like today, have to focus on the positive!! Pray that GOD will take care of the Negative and that HE will make all things work out for the better!!!
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